Dear readers,
PERSONAL
I’ve always understood the importance of doing uncomfortable things for the sake of making things happen. And I guess now when I think about it, I’ve always been putting myself in an uncomfortable situations in an effort to win over that part of me that wanted to stay stuck in the cozy comfort zone forever. However, I’ve never felt comfortable dealing with uncomfortable situations. To some confrontation comes naturally, to me not so much. Conflicts and voicing of opinion were always something I really tried to avoid for the fear of not being perceived a certain way even if that meant frustration and anger would show their ugly faces later on. Up until this year, I don’t think I was equipped with the proper tools to communicate what I was feeling and if I’m being real honest, I didn’t really take the time to sit down and understand those emotions myself and what they were doing to me, like really deeply analyze and understand them. I was always running towards a certain idea, chasing a certain goal and sadly emotions, although they played a huge part of my decision making and still do, never really took the prime spot of my attention until I started reading “Stolen Focus” by Johann Hari. I’ve written about it once before on Substack, but I feel like it’s worth mentioning again, as it was such an important book that gets a full credit for my mindset shift. Partly because it made me understand why certain aspects of my salad brain were stunt and didn’t function properly, but also because it made me realize what I’ve been doing to myself for the better half of these 10 years with my multitasking skills. Immediately after I started reducing spending time on social media, removed all email notifications and began focusing on one task at a time, I felt like I’ve gained a whole brand new brain in a matter of weeks. It made me a better communicator for sure and with that came also the comfort of dealing with uncomfortable situations. As it turns out, like most things in life, the more you do something, the more it comes natural to you. And if you ask me what was the most important thing that happened to me this year, I would probably say this book. It gave me a brand new perspective on life as I’m sure it will to most of you out there who are struggling particularly with brain fog, anxiety and attention disorder.
Going through this year was like going through a sharp meat grinder with spikes coming out left and right all over the place. Luckily, many I managed successfully to dull down and even avoid, but some stabbed me so hard that I can still feel the sting of the pain, the hemorrhaging and the scars left behind. The important thing is that I survived it and dare I say maybe even triumphed and my badge of honor came with the appearance of a brand new batch of annoying little baby hair strands. I lost so much of my hair last year due to stress that I consider these new batch to be the true warriors that withstand the test of, well, for the lack of a better metaphor, being an entrepreneur. So hurray for that. Nevertheless I survived, but it wasn’t pretty. In a nutshell, January came with the news of my mom battling colon cancer, followed by my cat battling glaucoma which resulted in him losing his right eye, crowned by, drumroll please, my dad’s heart surgery. I’m exhausted just writing about this, but I feel like it’s an important bit to write so I’m able to process this whole massacre and put a meaning to it, or at least try. So much of the first half of 2024 is fuzzy to me to the point that now when I think about it, it feels like it was someone else’s life, not mine. When all that drama wrapped up though, the rest of 2024 was a smoother ride and I could finally resume my focus on business.
Another thing that got me through the grinder was discovering the magic of instrumental guitar sounds through the incredible music of Hermanos Gutiérrez and tremendously enjoyed making a Guitar Sounds playlist on Spotify to accompany my self indulging nights.
In the department of personal development though I listened to a few podcasts that made a lasting impression on me . Here are the ones that did:
The Glucose Goddess with Jessie Inchauspé by the DOAC - I highly recommend you listen to this one if you’re like me struggling to regain focus after a meal. It shows the true cost of glucose spikes and why today more than ever before what you eat is the single most important thing.
In the department of PERSONAL FINANCE
The Savings Expert with Jaspreet Singh by the DOAC - for anyone who hasn’t figured out their financial situation or thinks they have when in the reality they haven’t. This episode offers an overview into the complicated and not so glamorous side of rich people and what it means to be one. This colorful character in just 2 and a half hours has taught me what years of studing in prestigious business schools failed to do, financial literacy.
In the department of BUSINESS
The Hermès by Acquired - follows all generations of the family ran business, the birth, rise and how they became and stayed the only business in the world of luxury fashion who still nurtures the power of craftsmanship and place it at the core of its business.
In those after working hours, instead of scrolling mindlessly through Instagram, I decided to be a bit more productive and scroll through Substack instead. There were so many articles I read that caught my eye, but the one that made a lingering impression on me was Why Do We Want To Look Like Glass? by Jessica Define. In today’s society where every magazine is trying to make you feel old and most beauty tips are geared towards preserving the fountain of youth, this one offers quite the opposite view on beauty. It’s very refreshing and well written and I highly recommend to give it a read.
PROFESSIONAL
You know how we all make resolutions at the end of every year? Well mine was to get a funding by the end of 2024. I was so determined, that I put whatever was left of my blood, sweat and tears to apply to every program I could think of in an effort to grow the business. I felt like I’ve reached the point in my career where I needed professional help from a mentor particularly to grow and scale the business, so half of the time I was applying for mentorship programs and the other half I spent my time sending my pitch deck to VCs (which I can 100% attest that it does not work, to save you some time there, if you’re planing to do the same, unless you know someone to make the personal introduction), accelerator programs and grants. Finally, beginning of June, I received the news that we got a grant we applied for at the end of last year. Sadly, I can not share more, since the project is set to begin in 2025, but the year started to look up from there onwards.
We are finally going to be able to rebrand Bastet Noir, have budget to invest in marketing and grow our community of women single parents. The project also entails investing in tech based solutions in terms of virtual fit and personalisation, which means next year, we’ll introduce virtual try-on and a new customisation process on Bastet Noir.
To me the hardest part of being an entrepreneur is the constant process of decision making involved. As a business owner you have to weigh in the consequences of every decision you ever make and assume the responsibility for every little thing that could go wrong, which consumes a lot of brain power and can be quite exhausting which brings me to the next thing, the responsibility of handling the budget we received. While I’m painfully aware that I was hoping and secretly praying for this every night for the past year and a half, I have to admit that I’m also a tiny bit worried and even a bit spooked. As a small business owner, I don’t have access to financial advisors, so handling budget falls under the realm of my responsibilities.
Questions like ‘what if I make the wrong decision of how the money gets handled’ , ‘what if the budget is simply not enough to get the needle moving’ and then ‘what if it all succeeds, will we be able to sustain the growth?’ still echo in my mind in the middle of the night, taunting me.
As I got thoroughly consumed by these thoughts and tortured myself on and off for the better half of this year, I finally was able to get some answers this December, when i attended an online session held by Nest (a non profit, connecting artisans with businesses). Led by the team behind Violette_Fr and the amazing Violette Serrat the session was essentially an overview of her business and how she managed to scale it. As part of the Q&A, she was personally engaged in answering the questions we had, which was really helpful to me as an entrepreneur in a way that it cleared up some dilemas I had.
This train of thought prompted me to also start thinking in the direction of mentorship and even bringing on a partner that could take us to the next level. So this was a huge part of my 2024 as well. Researching and applying for mentorship programs, which is not only time consuming but also a very draining process, going through written applications and then interviews and than the dreadful time of just waiting to hear back, knowing that the answer is most likely going to be a resounding “no”, but nevertheless you just can’t seem to kill that ember of hope hidden somewhere deep down. It’s a gruesome process, one that keeps you alert 365 days, 24/7 and haunts even your dreams.
I applied to 12 accelerator programs, 5 funds and 1 grant and even volunteered for an impact investing conference in Oslo called the Katapult Future Fest. You can find them all summed up here (download the complete list) in case you want to go for it, with the exception of the grant information, as that’s still an information I’m not at liberty to reveal. In addition to these, I also applied for 5 mentorship programs and got accepted into one The Global Good Fund. So 2025 will definately be geared towards the grooming of my leadership potential and something tells me that I’m going to be loving this. As much as I both loved and hated trying and failing on my own for the past 10 years, I think it’s about time a more experienced mentor stepped in to at least nudge me in the right direction. So I’m very much looking forward to the next year.
Apart for my grind, there have been some pretty surreal “pinch me” moments during this year as well, the biggest one among them being approached by Angelina Jolie’s team. It happened during one especially hot summer afternoon. While dipping my toes in the lake on a remote beach in Ohrid, my phone buzzed (it was during my “notifications on” period) and when I turned it, I saw an Instagram notification sent on Bastet Noir’s Instagram account. The notification said:
“Helen Aboah: Hi I lead atelier Jolie and would love to discuss carrying your product and also possibly press items for Angelina Jolie. Let me know the best way to reach you. Thanks Helen Aboah”.
At first I thought it was a scam, so like any normal human being, I went on to the profile and when I found out that she was indeed very real I found myself filled with immense pride and happiness. I haven’t told many people about this, just my family, but I did choose to share it here, not to brag but to just simply show you that nothing can stop you when you set your mind to it. Since then we’ve had few meetings with the team and are still in talks to display our next collection in their store. As of now nothing has been set yet, as we’re still in the negotiation period. Nevertheless, even if nothing comes out of it, it’s definitely one of the proudest achievements of my life and I’ll always return to this incredulous moment taking pride in the fact that the story and community I’ve managed to create from a remote place in the world got loud enough to attract the attention of such a humanitarian and powerhouse like Angelina Jolie. I took it as a sign that we’re definitely doing something right.
Speaking of something right, I wanted to let you know for those who will be reading this, that come 2025, there will be few changes to Bastet Noir. Some of you have grown to know the brand as a go to destination for custom made wedding guest and bridesmaid dresses and for almost a decade that’s exactly what we were. However, as I’m maturing (a fancy way of saying getting old) , my style, as well as the way I look at fashion, has also evolved and I realized that while being a part of this special ocassions in your lives has been a blast, what I want to do now is create something more permanent, rather then just a fleeting moment. What I want to do is create a label where comfort, exquisite quality and craftsmanship above all else will be at the front and center, a brand of elevated essentials you would love, hold and cherish for years to come while supporting the community of women single parents we’ve carefully built for the past decade. As we’re slowly stripping down the old Bastet Noir and stepping into the new year with an entirely brand new image, I felt like it’s important for me to write about it here, so past and future customers know what to expect.
So as yet another year rolls over, I find myself a little bit exhausted so I decided to go easy on myself and take 2 weeks off during the holidays. I do believe and hope my switching off will allow me to recharge my batteries and enter 2025 refreshed and reinvigorated. We have so much to do next year, even now I can feel the excitement growing, igniting a fire in my belly that will hopefully propel me to the next level.
And with that I conclude my last post for 2024 in the hope that next year I’ll be able to write a little bit more on here, as it is definitely something I tremendously enjoy and love doing. Until then, because sharing is caring, if you know someone who finds this random thoughts and opinions of mine fascinating, I give you permission to share this with them. You’re welcome.
In all seriousness though, I know time these days is a precious currency, so thank you for reading.